Thailand : Paradise for Indians
by 
by BANG & BHAT
I thanked the pretty air hostess while she helped me put my bags in to the cabin. I sat next to the window seat staring at the lights on the runway & a stream of thoughts flashed my excitement. I was about to land in 2.5 hours’ time, where even sky wasn’t the limit; Hookah, liquor, weed, strip clubs, girls (Hookers) & BOOM BOOM!! Yes, New Year 2014 was at travelers Mecca “Pattaya” & “Bangkok”. Being my 2nd visit to this place in the same year (wink), I still remember my giggle when dad asked me to be VERY careful.
Being the last week of the year, all flights were full & crowded. A fat ugly uncle around his 40’s, sarong (Lungi) tied up to his knees bumped in to the seat next to mine, he gave me a sarcastic smile showing out all his whites & I replied with a simple “Hello”. His look was a mix of ‘I know why you are going to Pattaya’ & ‘you make me remember my bachelor life’ types. However, I revised my plans of walking new places & talking to strangers before my eyes went asleep.
I stepped out of the hotel with my shorts & glasses on. 23rd Dec 2013 was a bright sunny Monday. This time; I was confident, I knew the roads, I knew what I was heading for & I knew I’ll enjoy it. I walked in to a nearby dim lighted strip club & ordered for the cheapest Hookah on the menu. The waiter with no expression on his face got my order while I was enjoying the stripper do her duty. The same guy came back to ask for more orders which we rejected & in unison an Indian who was observing from a distance came over & shouted against the loud music “Order for drinks, or they will send you out; you can’t watch the dance for free!!” so eventually, we ordered few beers while we sat there. The sun almost dropped down the horizon when we stepped out.
We headed straight to the Go Go Bar for couple drinks & then to a gay club. The annoying things were that we were the only odd ones in the crowd & I couldn’t point a babe around. However the Interesting, rather weird things were guys wearing their trousers backwards, men smooching with lipsticks & what not. Few even bumped on me but I just stayed away. I couldn’t stay here for long.
Russian Show- typically made for Indians
Russian show was our target the next day. This place seemed typically made for Indians, I dint see one uncommon face around & even got a 20% discount on the entry. The crowd was jaw dropped, soaking lips & eyes popping out their worn out faces. They had a series of shows listing Solo stripteases (One under the showers), naked group dance, Lesbian performance (including a threesome), live sex & a body to body massage!! It keeps getting pant soaky with every new performance. The striptease was exactly as I imagined them from the movies. The two men from the live sex were as huge as hulks, The Irony was to watch Indians enjoy Kamasutra postures and it being scripted by our own ancestors & flashed around the rest of the globe! Last show was body to body massage which was a voluntary act. Probably, this Indian volunteer could dream about it all his life!
I had the Russian show hangover all night, apparently even longer (Even now). Otherwise I went to the ping pong & Harem show before we waved our good byes to Pattaya. Met only a few serious Chinese & Japanese folks. No interesting conversations to pen down. Even the couple hours in Ping pong show amused me, the only place I saw small balls & two men fighting for the same one!! If you know what I mean (Wink).
On the way to Bangkok
My two hour drive to Bangkok on the 26th was short & calm, I relaxed well. Landed, rushed to the hotel, threw the baggage & away we went; even in the dark. The city never sleeps. It ticked twice on my wrist digital when I walked in to the sky bar in Soi 11 lane, Sukhumvit. I came here almost every evening except for my last day here. Here it was usually American oldies sipping their beer or whiskey. They were mostly couples or old men with young, cute looking Asian chicks!! After a few drinks, dance & chats it was 4:35 AM, to be precise, in the morning when I hit the bed.
We woke up only at dusk the next day & continued our venture to a Russian disco. I could sight many lusty middle aged Indian men at Shock 39. I was told there are couple more Russian discos named Bossy & Spicy. However, I checked out the lustful ambience in Shock 39 & was staring at a tall red head in her sexy outfit standing at a corner. Not for her clothing nor for her curves, but I got hard in my pants for the passion in her eyes. I almost skipped a blink when I observed a short local guy slip a chit in her hand & pace away. She looked at it & smiled at the air. Shockingly, in slow cat walk she reached the lap of a harsh looking Indian with black shades & cigarette puffing out of his filthy mouth. She passed some secrets on his shoulders & they walked out with giggles & grins. I abused the lucky bastard in my own; I never knew it was this easy to get a Russian hottie here!
Conversation with an old hack American guy
It was my 3rd evening in the sky bar on Soi 11. Interrupting the whiskey flow down my throat & thoughts swing through my head, I heard a voice beside me “Hey guys, How are you doing tonight?” with a rich American accent. I turned to see an old hack American guy with a drink in his hand & joyfully hopping to the music. He was a huge man with short hair wearing shorts & T, belly popping out. I replied with a humble smile “Hello Sir, we are doing great, thanks. How about you?” & we almost instantly became friends.
“Soi 11 is really awesome. I spend my evenings here & am loving it. This indeed is the most happening place in Bangkok!!”
“Yeah it’s a fantastic place to drink & meet new people“
“I second your thought, it’s been 10 days now and I can keep going…. Yaaay. So, are you guys here on a vacation or…? “, I cut him off, “We are here on a holiday for Christmas and New Year. I was here in April” a grin automatically appeared on my face “& couldn’t miss it for the New Year’s!”
He hopped on his toes with excitement “Woahh… Wonderful, how’s it so far? You guys must be having fun!! ”, with a naughty chuckle on his face.
We all laughed for what he meant & I abruptly questioned him “I see many people from the west, either with their wife or girlfriend. But, I constantly see old people, even you; with a local girl” pointing at the cute brunette on his left. “How’s that?”
He laughed out, thought for a while & naughtily answered, “Hmm, You guys caught me… Ha ha!!” looking at our stoned faces he continued “Chill guys, I was just kidding. It’s not what you guys think. They accompany us everywhere. It gives us a feel of being amongst localities, being one among them. These girls are really good. They take good care of us…” I spontaneously added “& fulfill all your desires too”.
But, he instantly repelled, “If I want sex I go to local massage parlour or a street hooker. These girls take us around places, for shopping, restaurants & pubs. We hire them from local escort agencies, we pay them well for our whole tour”
“It might sound strange, but few of my friends even got married to these girls.” Our conversation ended here. I’m not sure if he was annoyed, but he stopped talking. After an awkward silence he lifted his glass bottoms up & was gone.
After our drinks, we walked out from the Soi 11 lane to BTS Nana station. I spotted plenty of lady boys on the street pavements. Embarrassingly, even spotted Indians pick a few of them. I feel their disgust desire shiver through my veins. Later as planned, we took the local BTS train to Phahurat (Also called little India), had some Indian street food & did some window shopping around. It was mostly small bars, Indian shops & restaurants.
Encounter with Ladyboy
I almost escaped from a regretful incident to happen on the next day. It was a joyful walk, we were making jokes on each other, laughing & enjoying the evening while some blue & pink lights flashed bright our view. We discovered it was a club & decided to walk in. We almost stepped inside when an angry strong girly voice made us turn around,” This is a lady boy club, you guys are not allowed“. Oops, we were panting for breath back on the streets even before those words could digest in to our brains. This incident made me observe more. Well, women looking lady boys are huge, breasts popping out & they usually have long shaved legs.
However, I repeated the places I liked & met new people until it was the last day of the year & last day of the trip, 31st Dec 2013. My friends back at home would laugh at me, if I dint go for a massage even on my last day.
Laila, the Asian masseuse
It was an enclosed place I entered with pale walls & blurred lightings, just a curtain apart me & the rest of the world. I heard two female voices outside, though the language was alien for me I’m sure one of them was angry. Laila, the Asian masseuse recognized I was an Indian just as she entered & warned me “You all Indians come here only for Sex”. This annoyed me, but I continued to undress & lied down as I was instructed in silence. It was no sense to argue with an angry Asian chick. She had a wheatish Asian face with straight burgundy hair ending on her shoulders & tiny pointed eyes. She wore a light green t-shirt showing up her belly buttons (kinda sexy) with some part of her tattoo visible (Even more sexy) & a striped skirt up to her knees. I suspected what the tattoo was.
I tried to start a conversation with her while she poured the massage oil on her hands, quietly. She started off with my hands not muttering a word. I backed off with my talks & she continued to my legs, back & my neck at the end. Well, I relaxed & enjoyed throughout the hour. She next had to give me a hot bath to finish the process. I followed her to the shower. Curiously, I poked her again asking about her personal life. This time she replied, “Doing my diploma in Interior designing after graduation” (No doubt she spoke such good English).
With my awe I continued to enquire, “Wow, then why do you work here?? I’m sure you’ll get a decent job after your studies.
She laughed as she pushed me in to the shower & clarified, “I’m working here only from 3 months in my holidays. I want to earn a lot of money in very less time. I can use it for my studies & books.” Her answer wasn’t satisfying, but I stooped questioning further. She turned the knob loose & I closed my eyes as the warm water splashed on my head. The tattoo was still disturbing me, so I asked & she explained me about it with giggles, “The tattoo is from my boobs until here” placing her hard on her thighs “It is a scenery with sun, a green maintain & a river flowing. My brother tattooed me, he has a tattoo shop in Khaosan Road.” I came out of the shower & she added “If you plan to get one, you might have to wait for a year, my brother is very busy.”
On our way back I enquired further, “So, what kind of people come for massages here?”
With all the disgust on her face, “Mostly Indian men, I think around their 40s. They keep doing mischiefs & asking for sex. Our Madam attracts these guys telling we give body to body massage and everyone knows what happens here.” It was all done & I tried to stare in to her eyes, she wasn’t like any dumb women I met during my trip. Firstly I was happy, I could change her impression on Indians. Secondly I was Impressed too, so asked her out for a coffee, but she walked away leaving behind her warm figures on my skin & dismay in my heart.
Finally it’s time to go home
It’s the time we curse when happiness comes to an end, but forget to praise the memories we carry along. It was a pleasant journey back home with all the freshness awaiting for the year ahead. 1st of January 2014 had a deserted airport, I passed through my immigration & something started to tickle in my undies. Oops, I wondered ‘What the hell’ & realized it was just my urge to pee. Relax guys, Thailand is defiantly a safe place. I rushed to the toilet nearby, instantly smiled at the guy who stud next to me; a new habit cultivated from my recent touring. We chatted up about my vacation & he laughed to ask me “Why did you travel back on 31st night?? You should have enjoyed it there”. I replied with a clear tone “I prefer spending the New Year travelling, I have a feeling that I will travel all along the whole year. This is kind of a tradition we couple friends have”. Dazzled with my answer, he keenly questioned “So, how many days do you think I should plan for Pattaya & Bangkok?” And I responded with a tempting low tone, “IT DEPENDS ON HOW LONG YOU CAN HOLD YOURSELF!!”
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